"The Help" Helped

I think sometimes the Lord uses strange things to get our attention. I just finished reading "The Help" and it won me over in many ways. I loved it. The movie was great too. However,  the one thing that hit home for me was Aibileen encouragement to Mae Mobley because she was not getting it from her mother.

"You is kind. You is smart. You is important." You can watch it here. Does that just not melt your heart?

After reading this and watching it I decided that I am going to put this into practice every morning and every night. Looking right into Miss D's eyes I tell her the same thing, plus how beautiful she is, special she is to us and that God loves her and cares for her. Tonight after I was finished she said, "AGAIN!".

It struck me this past weekend that I have not been building her up enough. What I do for her in her third year of life could define who she is as a person. I would hate to think that I never made time for encouragement but always made room for correction.

I hope that this time for us will bond our hearts, help me love her more, and make her feel valuable.
I can only imagine the hurt and confusion in her heart...Lord, may these words be balm to her spirit and heart.

The Family Ref

Life is so busy. Going from two to three is a big jump...especially when you add a 3 year old. My house is always loud and I feel like I need to wear a black and white stripe shirt most days acting as our in-house ref. I finally learned for the most part to let them just have it out. To ignore it mainly and only focus on a few things. I got to the point where hearing my own voice was annoying.

The dynamics in our family has shifted and all kids are trying make our family puzzle work. Jack went from youngest to middle and the struggle there was painfully obvious...demanding all attention. Miss D went from the only child to a house of 3 and sharing was not in her vocabulary...but hitting and biting were.  Keegan turned into a full fledged Kindergartner...getting no naps...and is super tired when he gets home making afternoons miserable. Jack has missed Keegan so much while he has been at school and occasion has cried himself to sleep at nap time missing him.

In all of this I almost feel like things are beginning to settle a bit. There are days that I want to go outside and scream, and there are days where everyone seems to play together nicely. Miss D's hitting and biting streak has dramatically lessened, however the defiance has been kicked up a notch. "No" and "I don't want to" are her new phrases and boy...does that drive me UP THE WALL!!! Consistency has to be key with her, so time outs are given every time she says that..every time. We both hate it, however  I "think" she is getting the point that she can not disrespect me.

Last week she had her dental work done and after two visits, she has a shiny new "grill". Three silver teeth up top in the front and two in the back. We had to go back the second time because the dentist thought that a giant white tooth in-between two silver teeth looked right. (this was after I requested all silver) Um...no...it looked like a giant white tooth with 2 missing teeth on both sides of it. So, he made it silver and now it looks more uniform.

We had lots of one on one time while she was recovering from the dental work. She seemed to soak in the attention and her behavior seemed better. She kept on calling me "mommy" off and on and I told her that she could call me that if you wanted to. Now she is calling me mommy more than Mrs. Michelle. However, she informed me the other day that she has another mommy too. In a weird way, I feel sad for her other mommy.

Emotionally, this foster to adopt situation is super hard for me. The love I need for Miss D is just not natural. You think it should be that you are rescuing a child out of a situation and that you automatically will love them. I keep praying that God will give me an eternal love for her and something so unexplainable that I can only attribute to Him working through me. I care for her deeply, but am begging God to make me smitten with her like I am with my own boys.

God has a lot of work to do in our family...but I know He can do it and it will be amazing.
In the mean time...I will just put on my black and white stripe shirt and keep training my kids to follow God and walk in His truth...even when it is hard.

We're a happy fama-wee....

Since my last post was extremely depressing, I thought I should follow up quickly with a good post. Last weekend we went to my parents house for my cousin's wedding. We had a great weekend and I was able to catch my breath and Miss D had distractions (Gi Gi and G-Bob).

This week we have turned over a new leaf. Not to say that we want digress, but Miss D has stopped her tantrums quickly and the hitting has been few and far between. I can actually breathe and enjoy life as a family of 5. My neighbor Tawanda has been stopping by for an hour in the afternoons and it is just enough distraction to cook and get food on the table.

Week 5 has been a turn around for how she sees us. She has intermittently called me "mom" and "Mrs. Michelle". When she calls me "mom", Jack immediately corrects her and says, "No! That is not your mommy." I quickly correct him and let him know that I am for right now. Poor guy just does not get it..but really...what 3 year old can possibly understand?

At school today, she (with her teacher) wrote, "My name is Miss D. I love: Michelle, Keegan, Jack and Jonathan." My heart skipped a beat when I read that. Then after school, we were watching Yo Gabba Gabba, the family episode, and she said that she was in our family with a really sweet smile.

Her favorite song (ironically) to sing right now is "I love you, you love me...we're a happy fama-wee." Keep singing that Miss D and hopefully it will become a reality! (wow..I just rhymed)

God is really amazing. I could just cry writing this next part in pure happiness. God has not abandoned me.  Jen Hatemaker wrote this post that I totally identified with it. It is so good to have encouragement!  Also, I have a friend from church named Karen who got a 3 year old (Tia) and 5 month old (Annie) placement 5 years ago. (they are adopted now) I have been talking to her on and off and I feel like she is the only person right now that fully gets me in all of this. She has been there. She knows what I am feeling. Well...guess what? Annie is on Keegan's soccer team and I nearly screamed in excitement when they walked up to our first practice tonight.  I no longer have to play phone tag with Karen because I get to talk to her every Thursday and Saturday for a while. Praise God for His provision in my life. I can get some steady encouragement from someone who walked in my shoes. I love you Lord...you knew what I needed.

Oh and yes.

I am an ordained "soccer mom" now. Yes, 5pm and I am putting 3 sets of shin guards on with those crazy long socks.

Awesome.

Now I just need a mini van. 

The End of Myself

(This might be really depressing for you to read, but I want to document this from an honest approach. In Miss D's words "I ain't" going to sugarcoat anything.)

Week 4 has been very hard. I can not even really describe it to people, it is that challenging. Miss D hit this mean streak of hitting Keegan and Jack, shouting, throwing fits, etc....ALL DAY.  From what my Arrow rep says it is very normal for them to hit this wall at some point and their emotions play out their aggression.  They are looking into some play therapy for her to help her with this transition.

I had several melt downs of my own this week of full fledged crying.  I am not this kind of person but I could not pull myself together. I had so many emotions that I wished that I was not having. I wondered if I made a mistake bringing her into my family. I asked myself if I could love her the way that I loved my children. Could I work within CPS limits and not spank...because nothing else is working. I thought we dug ourselves in this hole and now there was no way out. My self-control was being tested beyond belief. Nat called yesterday and  in that moment I would of sent it to voice mail but instead I answered it for her to talk me down and lower my blood pressure.

The message that her and others have been saying to me over and over is that I must put my eternal eyes on. I know that...I really do...but in the moment it is hard. However, one thing she said hit home with me. I have come to the end of myself so that God can take over. Surrender all that I am. I was there. I did not even want to wake up the next morning to start again. The white flag had been pulled to the top of my flagstaff. I have no other option but to let Him flow through me to work through the next few weeks. What an amazing testimony to be at that place to KNOW HE IS ABLE even in my weakness. I remember Jerrell Altic telling me once, "To truly follow God is not comfortable". Yep, sure isn't.

Luckily last night I was able to go to Lupe's with some friends. (Mexican food fixes most everything for the moment!) My poor friend Stacie was the witness to my tears...I am so glad that I have amazing friends to be real with. Seriously, what would I do without the body of Christ? To have amazing prayer warriors fighting the enemy alongside me and begging God to intervene...there is nothing like it.

This morning I woke up with a different resolve. In way I felt God get in the driver seat. I was actually able to praise Miss D and love on her differently today. The smell of her shampoo used to make me queasy because of all the stress that I associated with it. Today, she even smelled different. Weird I know.  Her fits even seemed considerably less. I could actually give her a couple of stickers for good behavior. I know that this road will have many turns, but today was a good drive through the Hill Country. Calm.

God also is able to bless. This morning I tried to pay my cell bill and realized that my roll over minutes had expired and thus landing me with a $172.00 bill. I called AT&T and without even asking this guy took it off and gave me 1000 roll over minutes. I wanted to reach through the phone and hug the guy...it almost made me cry.  I was able to put Miss D on the same team as Jack for soccer, even after the sign ups ended. The most surprising blessing was my neighbor Tawanda. She showed up at the door at 4:30 and let herself in. She was born at 20 something weeks and now at 23 she is a very high functioning adult. She lives down the street from me and walks the neighborhood. Normally, it would annoy me, but today, it was a great distraction. I was able to get dinner together with her entertaining Miss D.  She spent a good 30 min. playing with my kids. I invited her back next week. :) I might even pay her to come do this for me in the afternoons. I bonded with her a little over VBS week when she rode with me and helped me with the boys. A couple months later, I am thankful for our little friendship.

We leave tomorrow to go to Mansfield for the weekend for my cousins wedding. I am hoping that this will be a good experience for all of us. Some good family time is needed. A good drive will be good too...every child strapped in and hopefully asleep.

Love Makes All Things Easy

I found this frame at Walmart the first week I had Miss D and it said, "Faith makes all things possible...love makes all things easy." I placed a picture of her in it and put it by my bed. It is a good little reminder that we need to trust God through all of this that He CAN protect Miss D from the family line she is from and the generational sin that is rooted so deep. I need to trust that even if she is placed back in the family, that He can save her. He does not really need us even though we would love for Him to use us in her her life.

The court date Monday went well as far as we are concerned. We did not have to be there but the information we have is from out attorney. Everyone who showed up did not look impressive or trustworthy. The one person that I thought was going to fight for her did not show up at all. They provided the name of one person they want her to live with and they have to check that option out. This option in my book is the worst case scenario and I can't imagine a judge giving Miss D to her. The parents and everyone else interested in Miss D were supposed to have a placement meeting this week as well and everyone canceled and wanted to reschedule. This of course looks to the court that Miss D is not a priority because both main parties do not have jobs and they have time to be there. I found out yesterday that our cps worker's supervisor would like to push toward termination of rights. That is rare and I am excited to have someone fighting for Miss D. Our attorney is awesome too! She is so detailed and tells us everything. She asked the judge if she could approve the home that Miss D would be placed in before she is moved. He approved it! She has a foster child of her own and is passionate about the child and what is best. She loves what we are doing with her and how we are taking care of her. One piece of interesting information that we received is that she was a preemie and born at 6 months gestation. This is very helpful to know.

I have been focusing on the second part of that phrase this week. "Love makes all things easy."
Every day has been different in its own way. I am trying to figure out what makes her tick and what makes her ticked off. I finally figured out the key to the madness is to flat ignore her tantrums. It works like a charm. Originally I was putting her into time-out for every ugly behavior, but it just made her more mad. She liked the attention so she kept on. Now, if the attention is not placed on her at all...she gives up. Miss D and Jack are getting a long so much better!!! The turning point for us was Tuesday morning. We went to Aunt Finine's house and she told them to go shopping and play "store" and they played beautifully together. We still have yelling matches every once in a while, but they are settling in the house together better. Jack no longer growls at her. :)

Her sleep patterns are getting better which has helped my mood out too. She is finally relaxing and trusting us. I don't have to sit in her room half the night anymore. I have slowly inched my self out the door and she trusts me that I will still be there. This is huge! She has started to kiss me and tell me she loves me before she goes to bed. She is precious!

I took her to the eye doctor this week and found out that she has to have eye surgery to correct her lazy eye. The first person doctor I called was the chief of ophthalmology at Texas Children and scored an appointment with him October 14. The best thing is that...HE ACCEPTS MEDICAID!  SCORE!

She starts MDO on Tuesday and this will be a great thing for her. I suspect that we will see her blossom in the next couple weeks. And guess what...I get 10 hours to myself! It has been a challenge to get even the basic things done around the house. The paperwork on foster children is a lot and with a child who needs medical attention the amount of time on the phone is crazy trying to make appointments.

I think week four will be even better! A funny thing happened two days ago. Arrow called us and asked if we wanted a 8 month old. It just made me laugh. I could not imagine having more than one right now. I politely declined. :)

Miss D Part Two

We have almost hit the two week mark since we had Miss D I am sitting here with a bowl of ice cream and I finally feel a bit of normalcy and out of the fog. I can begin the processing that I have needed to do for a week now. It has been a interesting ride the past two weeks. You pick one emotion..I have had it. 

The sun came up on day two and I walked into her room with this huge dimply smile. She reached up for me and when I picked her up she laid her head on my shoulder and began stroking my hair. At that moment I melted...how could you not? The rest of the day consisted of correcting different behaviors. For one, she did not know how to eat at a table. She wanted to put a napkin on the floor and it took a couple meals, but she got the idea that at our house we don't do that.  The next objective was to actually use the napkin on how it was intended to be used instead of her shirt. I learned that day that she had a different vocabulary than us..which if I were to be perfectly honest made me laugh a bit that it was coming out of a 3 year olds mouth. She did not urinate for 24 hours and lets just say she was very gassy. Nutrition was not a priority.

I have taken her to the doctor three times for blood work and shots...all 6 of them. This week I get to take her to the dentist for a mouthful of problems. Next is the eye doctor to check out her eyes.

The world that she lived in contained no boundaries and no discipline. The word "no" was not said very often. This has been the hardest obstacle of them all. She loves us...she ignores us...she loves us...she ignores us.  Now..I hear that girls are different than boys in that there is a lot more emotion..and she is 3. Still, it is hard to undo three years of freedom.  I know one day she find comfort in routine and boundaries. In fact, we are seeing signs that are very positive.

Miss D was the only child in her house and then she was brought to my house with two other kids..one being 3. This has been extremely difficult and lots of emotion is wrapped around this subject. My Jack is the sweetest, most loving boy...but has a temper. She brings that out in him. Just too much sassy for him. I have been the mediator so much between those two and the bickering about drives me bananas. Last Tuesday I called my husband and said, "I can't take it anymore...I have to get out of the house...lets do dinner out."  We went to Gringos, Mexican food is my comfort food,  and I just cried and cried at the table. Luckily, we had a amazing waitress, bless her beautiful heart, that played with my kids while I tried to pull it together. The "real" emotion here was..."What did I just do to my family?" Of course, as I rocked her to sleep that night God reminded me that I am doing exactly what is right for my family whether they get it now or not.

I feel like I just went through the newborn, bringing home baby, phase. I have been zapped. Literally, there has never been a point where I wanted to dig a hole and jump in and throw e-mail and phones out. I just had nothing left in me to converse with anyone and neither did I really want to. Maybe this whole fostering thing gets easier. I do not know how people get a child after child into their home being this emotional.

One thing I know is this.....if Miss D came into my home to teach me the importance of adoption from right where we live...God achieved that. I know there is a lot of hype of international adoption. It is a beautiful thing and God bless the people who go get those babies and protect them. However, the same pictures you see of neglected kids across seas...were the same pictures I saw of Miss D when CPS first got her.  There are holes in our system, and I might be another story of losing a child, but she needed me and other kids need you...even if it is for a short window of time. I can't even express to you how amazing it felt to walk into church with Miss D and the amount of people who came up and embraced her. If she stayed with us, her life would be so much different. A life of love, values, boundaries, family and Jesus. Now only God knows how her life will turn out...who am I to say we are the best choice...but for her to leave our home and know what she will miss...is simply heartbreaking.

I have been playing praise music, Praise Baby and Sing over Me, in her room at night hoping that God's truth would pour into her soul. It also plays over the monitor at night. This song is beautiful and so comforting to us both.

Hold on to Jesus by Erin O'donnell
You're a little piece of heaven
You're a golden ray of light
Ad I wish I could protect you
From the worries of this life
But if there's one thing I could tell you
It's no matter what you do
Hold to Jesus -
He's holding on to you

The world will try to tell you
That might is more than right
That beauty's on the outside
And being good's a losing fight
But remember what I've told you
Because the world will make you choose
Hold to Jesus -
He's holding on to you

Hold on to Jesus
Cling to His love
Rest deep in His mercy
Whenever things get rough
Don't lose sight of His goodness
And don't ever doubt this truth
That when you hold on to Jesus
He's holding on to you

Hear me dear Jesus
Rock this little one to sleep
Keep her close when she's scared
And give her grace when she is weak
I know she'll stumble
But I know she'll make it through
If you hold to her just like
You said You'd do
Hold her Jesus -
And she'll hold on tight to You

Court Date Monday

Monday is the first official court date for Miss D's family. We don't need to be there and Miss D does not either.  Please pray for us because some family will put up a fight for her but it is not what she needs. I am not sure I know how to deal with all of this. Pray for strength to get through the next few days.

Miss D Part One

A little over a week ago, our family grew to 5. I got a call on the way back from Dallas about a 3 year old red head that needed a home. With a little hesitancy, I accepted. Jonathan was fully excited and I was nervous. I don't even remember my drive home. August for us was slammed and there were only narrow gaps of time that would be okay for a placement, and just as the Lord does in perfect timing we got her in the 3 days that were between my visit to Dallas and our family vacation to Galveston. I am not sure I would of planned it that way, but God has a funny way of stretching a highly organized woman.

I got home at 4:30 and 5:30 my Arrow*  representative came with paperwork for us to sign. At 6:00, my little red headed girl came with her CPS worker, who dispelled any wrong notions I had about the system. She was amazing.  Miss D came in bouncing up to me and for the first time I thought, "Is this happening?" Adorable, full of energy, dimples & freckles she was ready for her adventure of exploring our house. My boys (5 and 3 1/2) came down the stairs and looked through the railing like they knew something big was happening and they were very unsure of it.

My husband and I signed our life away in paperwork, while my boys were doing a quick adjustment to her.  My friends were serving pizza to all kids, bringing in a mattress and taking down a crib (we thought we would be getting a younger child), and I could hardly think straight. Our journey in foster care was starting and there was no backing out.  To fully love was not a choice, but a demand. And so it began.

Miss D got two dunks in the bathtub that night, much to her demise, while my boys were very unsure of their new world. Jonathan had to go back to work much to his disliking at 8pm. She came downstairs with me,  and when we turned the lights down low, her happy self turned into frightened self and the tears came. We both sat on the couch and had a good cry together. She wanted to be home and be with her grandmother.  I was unsure I did the right thing in accepting the phone call and scared. Was her situation going to lead to adoption or is there going to be heartbreak in the end. Could I give adequate attention to my boys? Could I do this emotionally? It was real and not just an idea anymore.

My friends went to the store and bought sippie cups, clothes, panties, etc. for me. Earlier another friend bought almost every 3t and 4t outfit on the sale rack at Carters. Praise the Lord for awesome friends and the body of Christ. She came with one skirt and a shirt from her home...and nothing more.  The one thing that turned the night around was the purchase of a baby doll. It gave her comfort. We headed upstairs to her bed and we read to her but she was not giving up. Finally at midnight, I started to sing to her Jesus Loves Me and she immediately rolled over and gave in to sleep. Could God possibly have given me a child that loves music as much as me?

I was a zombie. I could not process the day. I was vacant. How was life going to continue with this little girl who wanted her grandmother? How were my boys going to adjust? How was my 3 year old, strong willed little boy going to adjust to another 3 year old in the house?

The next day came and sun coming up was good for us all. Part 2 to come.


*Arrow Child & Family Ministries is our agency we are fostering through in conjunction with CPS.

I'm a Grad!

I posted beginning of January that I was going to read the bible in 90 days. Well, in exactly 90 days...I made it! It was easy some days and difficult others, however I wanted to persevere toward the end. I was among the first online community to do the 90 day Challenge through Zondervan. This was my first journey through the pages of the entire bible, and I have to say that it was an amazing experience. There were so many things that I have never heard about and of course others that I loved to be reminded of.

People started getting interested in the challenge, so I created the 180 challenge. Not that I don't like the 90 day challenge, but because I did not think I could win people to do it again with me. Since the beginning of April, I have 37 people reading along with me. We have online discussions through facebook and I am talking scripture with people all through the week. I love it. There is accountability in being in the Word everyday no matter how busy your day and life is at the moment.

The "D" word.

Somehow I have obtained 10 more followers on my blog in the months that I was not blogging. Not that I don't mind, but maybe I should give you something to read about.

Keegan is 3 and Jack is 2. This should sum up my life right now. We are entering into some new phases right now. Keegan is starting to have spiritual conversations that usually start like this, "Mom, God put Jesus on the cross".  My response is, "Yes, Keegs, do you know why?" Keegs replies, "Because of sin".  I ask what that is and he says, "When I do bad things." Home run brother! So, now the times I discipline him there is now a fresh spin on things.  However, the "D" word is about every 30 minutes in our house. 

I have started to realize that discipline is never convenient for parents. Maybe that is why it is so hard.  It disrupts schedules, makes outings miserable with crying, and dang, can I say more...makes the whole house miserable sometimes. I don't want to be the parent that just got tired and gave up and my boys are who rule the house.  It will pay off in the long run even if it makes bad days, but for now, I want to hold fast to training them by discipline so I don't look back and wished that I would have not been so lazy. Really, though, God means it when he says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

Welcome Preslee Mariah

I am so excited to announce that my friends Christine and Zach welcomed their first child, Preslee Mariah. There are really no words to describe how cool it is to see them hold this little girl and to know that God has divinely linked them together. To know that He has orchestrated this adoption from the beginning of time is so special.

God has been so faithful to provide for them financially and we sold over 180 shirts to help out! We shipped out the remaining shirts the day she was born! How is that for timing! God is so into the details.

My friends have inspired me through their perseverance and patience in this process. I have learned so much by watching them and love them even more now.

Welcome Preslee....I love you!

Grave Digger

Monster Trucks. I never thought that I would be excited about them, but look...I am standing proudly in front of one with my family. It all started when my friend Amanda's son Jackson gave Keegan his monster trucks for his second birthday. He loved those things and yes, we still play with them. The yellow one is the only one that still has all wheels. When we visit Mansfield, my dad always has Monster Truck Rallies on dvr for their morning amusement while drinking milk and coffee.  That show has infiltrated our lives with verbage such as "Grave Digger", "Medusa", "Backwards Bob" and of course, "Batman".  In January, the boys on my side of the family loaded up and went to see a Monster Truck Rally in Houston. Keegan was annoyed at how loud it was, but his smile when came home said, "That was awesome!"

Knowing how amused my children are about Monster Trucks, my neighbor Merry Lynn lets us know that a monster truck by the name of "uh..I think it is Saturday Death" will be at their Easter Egg hunt the day before Easter. She laughed thinking that it was really weird/funny that that would be there, but maybe the name fit.  So, we ventured out to her church and from afar Keegan yells, "GRAVE DIGGER!!!". This is serious business yall.  Yes, "Saturday Death" was actually "Grave Digger", one of the most famous Monster Trucks. It was a little strange to have it in the church parking lot, hey, if it can get that crowd to church...DO IT! (The Lutherans have no shame!) I found a man who had a gigantic camera to take our picture and sweetly said, "Can you e-mail this to us...we LOVE monster trucks." Did I really say that...yes.

I am telling you, this is one huge truck. I was almost giddy about it because my kids were giddy. They got a signed autograph and everything from the actual driver.  Now that is cool.  Being a boy mom can be fun...I just have to let my pride go a little and forget what a dork I am just to see smiles on their faces.

Buy a T-Shirt: Support an Adoption

One of my best friends and her hubby, Christine and Zach, are on a journey towards adoption.  It has been such a moving experience and I loved every moment watching God unravel His plan for a child in their life. If you could lookup the word "mom" in the dictionary you would see Christine's name right there beside it. She loves children and has a natural unexplainable gift with them.  Why the ones that are desperate for children are the very ones that have problems conceiving? That will be one of my first questions to God when I see Him face to face. However, I know that God has a plan for all the babies without parents! This will be an incredible union this spring when Christine and Zach get to hold their baby for the first time.  If you would like to support them in this journey, I have designed a shirt to help raise money for their adoption.

Click HERE to purchase!

Happy Birthday Jack Jack!

Two years seems to go faster and faster these days! I feel however that the last two years top my accomplishments in life by far. Jack is now TWO!! Yikes...time goes by so fast.

Jack has rounded the corner of fussiness and into a delightful stage. Of course the second year molars around the corner, but I am savoring his playfulness, smiles and kisses.

Here are a few things about Jack that I think you should know.
*He is my little singer. He can pick up tunes really fast and I think I heard him hit a note of harmony the other day. Of course, you know this speaks to my heart more than anything.
*He loves to kiss and not just on the lips but on your forehead, cheeks and chin. A little lover boy.
*He loves the alphabet. Not very ordinary but he is obsessed with them. He carries alphabet letters in his pockets. He is attracted to all sorts of letters in public and knows the sounds they make and even some of the lowercase letters.  Pretty cool if you ask me, of course, I am his mom. :)
*He loves puzzles, but the most fun part of course is dumping it all off the board when he finished putting it together. I usually get to put it together at the end of the day.
*He loves Dora yogurt, chocolate milk, anything sweet, mandarin oranges, vienna sausages, McDonalds nuggets, and pancakes.  Oh yes...and his absolute favorite, Nemo gummy snacks that turn his poop bright green.
*Speaking of Nemo, he loves that movie. He even likes to sing about him, "Yes Nemo loves me, yes Nemo loves me, Yes Nemo loves me, the bible tells me so." Not sure what bible he has, but he is convinced.
*Still loves his pacee. Little does he know that when he gets all his teeth in we will say goodbye to it.
*He can throw a fit and really good ones.
*He likes to take his arms out of his car seat straps. No matter how tight we get them, he plays Houdini and busts out of them again.
*Jack loves to swing and loves the inertia feeling of being swung around and getting dizzy.
*He is so cuddly and really I can not imagine life without him. He makes me smile day in and day out.

Are YOU Up for a Challenge?

Join me on January 1st to read the bible in 90 days.  Click here for more info. I am fully aware the challenge that is set in front of me and am ready to embrace it!

Michelle Sanders Designs

Hello? Are you out there? Are all my old readers out there? Hello?

I know it seems like I have abandoned ship, but I am been very busy starting my own company. It has turned out to be more involved than originally planned but I am glad that I stuck my neck out there.

I have dreamed about starting a design company that focused mainly on announcements, Christmas cards, and personal notecards that are less expensive than some of the major companies out there. I started small this last October and only let a few people know (mainly from church and family) just to make sure I could keep up.  I received a great response and now I think I am ready to put myself out there to the blog world. (If you are out there!!)

If you have a few seconds, please visit my (growing) website: www.michellesandersdesigns.com
Some of my samples from this Christmas are posted, but I am currently not taking any more holiday orders. Just keep me in mind for the new year.

I am building my inventory, so if you don't see something you need, I am custom creating every card until I get a good base.

Hope yall have a Merry Christmas!

The "Supers"

An Ominous Feeling

Some days are more eventful than other days. Some days are quite boring. Some days you wish you could just forget about. That was yesterday. It all started Sunday night when Keegan got a stomach bug.  Monday morning Jonathan left to go to Dallas and I was filled with anxiety hoping that Jack and I would not get sick. Obviously, I felt something ominous coming on, because the next 24 hours proved it.

Monday afternoon Keegan got sick again and I sprayed lysol religiously around the house. Jack woke up at 10:45 that evening and cried almost through out the night because he was teething. I ended up putting him in bed with me for a very restful sleep. (not!) Tuesday morning, Keegan woke up and he was dehydrated that he was very limp and not engaging in conversation. Luckily, I had pedyalite and that made him bounce back rather quickly. It was a scare, but thanks to a wise mother (my mother) it was taken care of.

So after a crazy morning and getting Jack ready for school, I patted myself on the back thinking how well I handled all the above situations without losing it. We get in the car, pull out of the garage and I hear a "SCRAPE...CRUNCH!" Yep. I ran into Jonathan's car that is normally not there. The side of my scraped and dented the jeep and my expedition has a scrape on the side. Dang.

The afternoon was uneventful, until we left the house to get Jonathan from Enterprise. I locked the door, got distracted for a split second with Jack, and Keegan pulled the door closed. Quickly I realized that my keys were right inside.  Jonathan's boss had to drop him off of the house and I really wanted to hide from him. Great first impression, huh? We got into the house, by way of a screwdriver, and then ate my sorrows away at our local mexican food joint.

I guess in the whole scope of things going on in this world, this is minor, but for sure I was ready to close my eyes and go to sleep last night.

Anyhow, I am really glad that it is Wednesday morning and I get to go to bible study. So far no stomach bug for anyone else in the family, so I am counting my blessings!

Messina Hof

Part Two of our little trip to College Station was a visit to Messina Hof Winery . I have to admit that I am not a wine drinker because a coke to me always trumps anything else. I am sure some of you are laughing at this! Anyhow, I became a little more cultured in the wine department and it really fascinated me. We were able to go out into the fields and pick grapes, then we did some stomping. Let me stop here. Messina Hof did the whole stomping thing a little injustice. In our minds we were picturing the whole "I Love Lucy" experience, where she was in a wooden vat stomping by herself. Well, we were crammed five at a time in a plastic container. I handed a worker my camera and she took a picture of us waste up. Hmmm. I think she missed the point. Then after this experience of squishing grapes that everyone else's feet have been in (I tried not to think about it) we went into the plant where the wine is made and bottled for some sampling. Who knew that there was such a science in making different kinds of wines! The guy with the red hat that we are pictured with is the winemaker, who will pass the red hat on to his son to run the winery. I loved the tradition of it all. Here are some pics....

Not a Mid-Life Crisis

So this year I turned 30. Kind of a bummer. The sound of twenty-something sounds youthful and so many cool experiences happened in those 10 years. I was still in college living in a dorm and finishing my first year book, graduated from college, moved to Houston, was girls minister at HFBC, went and planned many mission trips to Latvia, Nashville, and Houston, planned camps, retreats, sang at lots of different venues,...and most most importantly I got married and had my two boys. Seriously, the best 10 years of my life and God blessed me in abundance.

Now, I am 30 and the excitement has slowed down a little and monotony of everyday care of my boys is getting to me. I know that these 10 years will be totally different with all the experiences that comes with a family. However, I needed to mark it with an adventure, and that is just what I did. For the past few years, I have been wanting a nose piercing and Christine and I have planned on doing it together. It did not feel right until we went out of town to celebrate my 30th birthday in College Station beginning of August. It also marked a new revelation of freedom to me. It did not really matter what anyone else thought...I was doing because I wanted it. Not the twenty something Michelle.... but the thirty something Michelle who has FINALLY come terms with how God views me and not afraid of how people view me.

So, now that that spiel is over, here we go. I was a little hesitant at first because it is always fun to entertain an idea, but to actually do it....your stomach can do some summersaults. We found a incredibly clean piercing place that was more sterile than a hospital and it was actually affordable. He was the most reputable guy around town, had a nickname that I will have to sensor from this blog, was dressed in scrubs and I felt very confident that yes, my nose was going to get the best treatment from this perfectly manicured eyebrow dude. He explained to me that getting his eye brows waxed hurt worse than a piercing. I will have to disagree strongly on that one. Moving on, Christine decided to go first and that was my first mistake. When you get a piercing, do not give yourself time to think about it. I was sick to my stomach. Jill was kind enough to distract me by talking to me and Natalie found it fun to laugh at me. They proceeded to ask me in jest how my choir director was going to like my nose piercing on Sunday morning with my robe. We don't wear robes, but they guy who was having us fill paperwork out thought I was odd for sure.

I did not hear any yelping from Courageous Christine in the piercing room and she came out with her studded nostril like he was not big thing. So, I went in and of course asked a bazillion questions, and told him that I could faint and please do not let me stand up without his assistance, did I mention that I don't want this to go wrong? I was talking in circles because I was nervous. He was a very fine piercer, and talked me through it all. "Forcepts in the nostril.", "Poke through the nose", "Twist in the nose screw" and he was done. Phew! I will say that yes, it did hurt, and hurt even worse when my towel caught on it the next morning. UGH!

However, Christine and I did it and we love it. So, for those of you who think this is a mid-life crisis...you are dooming me to live till 60...so let's not go there.

A little nauseous...Jill was trying to distract.... (I am a dork..I know)

Before picture...

Christine being laid back as usual...He was about to mark her nose with a plastic wrapped sharpie. (Sterile I tell you!)

Okay...I admit I can be a little high strung...

The moment...

Ah yes...the finished product....beautiful.